PART 1: ME AND TAI®️
Here is my thesis on balancing the feminine and masculine with TAI, to create healthy and happy relationships.
Let me introduce myself. I am Katia Caterino, a Love/Feminine Coach specializing in relationships. Through various trainings centered on this theme, I focus on rebalancing the feminine and masculine to create healthy and happy relationships. My training began with psychocorporeal relational counseling and coaching in the field of romantic relationships, which I complemented with specific trainings on the feminine and masculine at a physical and energetic level, through mythology, dances for female well-being, and breathing practices from the Piena di Vita®️ system by Sajeeva Hurtado.
Before proceeding, it’s important to clarify that when we talk about the feminine and masculine, we are not referring to men and women, a common but erroneous concept that leads to confusion. Feminine and masculine energies are present in both men and women, manifesting through specific qualities and characteristics, in varying proportions.
Feminine qualities include receptivity, intuition, compassion, empathy, tenderness, gentleness, and sensitivity. Feminine energy is also associated with cyclicality, darkness, silence, being, the moon, receiving, contemplation, nourishment, inner strength, stillness, creativity, cold, the earth, water, the inner world, night, and feeling.
The hormones associated with feminine energy are estrogen, oxytocin (the “cuddle hormone”), and progesterone. In terms of the autonomic nervous system, it is linked to the parasympathetic system, which is most active at night and during moments of relaxation and energy recovery.
An excess of feminine energy, without the mediation of the masculine side, leads to stagnation, passivity, receiving without giving, complaints, victimhood, a sense of powerlessness, sadness, apathy, and procrastination, manifesting as the shadow side of the feminine.
Masculine qualities include external strength, the power that brings our inner world and beauty outward, dynamism, focus, action, giving, movement, achieving goals, boundaries, words, action, determination, thinking, warmth, daylight, support, structure, protection, rationality, the mind, fire, air, and the sun.
The hormones associated with masculine energy are testosterone, adrenaline, and cortisol. The part of the autonomic nervous system linked to masculine energy is the sympathetic system, which is more active during the day and drives action and alertness.
An excess of masculine energy, without the mediation of the feminine side, leads to aggression, control, anger, rigidity, lack of listening, dominance over others, excessive doing and giving as a savior or persecutor, and results in stress, manifesting as the shadow side of the masculine.
Many philosophies associate the feminine with the belly and gut feeling, and the masculine with the head, shoulders, and a more logical, rational mind.
However, I believe that within our three centers—belly, heart, and head, where our three Dantians reside—both feminine and masculine qualities coexist.
When these two types of qualities, feminine and masculine, are united within us in the right proportions, we access our inner magnet, our personal power, and we can create healthy relationships with a partner, balancing giving and receiving, in harmony with our prevailing qualities.
My studies, observations, and understanding of the feminine and masculine have led me to create my program “Queen in Love,” divided into levels, to guide single women tired of wrong relationships to believe in themselves and love again, in order to create healthy and happy relationships. This program was first tested on myself, allowing me to transform my love life, and I now use it with women who are willing to take on this challenge, who wish to turn their romantic life around by working on the feminine and masculine aspects, specifically on:
- The Feminine of the Belly, Aphrodite, which can be in light or shadow, and is associated with sensual, charismatic, and magnetic femininity.
- The Feminine of the Heart, Eve, which can be in light or shadow, and is associated with femininity that finds fulfillment through relationships.
- The Feminine of the Head, Lilith, which can be in light or shadow, and is associated with femininity that finds fulfillment through personal achievement. Additionally, Eve and Lilith have specific subgroups.
To tap into our personal power and create healthy and happy relationships, it is important that the aspects of Eve, Lilith, and Aphrodite are in the light and united.
That’s why I created the Love Matrix, a series of tests and a questionnaire that help determine which aspect of femininity is predominant, whether it is that of the belly, heart, or head at this moment, and whether we need to work more on the feminine or masculine to rebalance and unite them in a harmonious couple.
It was precisely this work on the belly, heart, and head, initiated with the Piena di Vita breathing system by Sajeeva Hurtado, also better known as Ovarian Breathing, Feminine Alchemy®️, different from that of Taoism (which I also practiced), that led me to seek a method and system based on the belly, heart, and head. In my research, I found TAI, Inner Alchemy Techniques by Andrea Fredi.
This technique has been revolutionary because it allowed me, and continues to allow me, to access my memories stored in the belly, heart, and head, and make instantaneous changes, altering my awareness and perception of how I experienced those events.
Among the most significant blocks in my life was the sense of guilt, which hindered my actions and prevented me from living my life peacefully. Through TAI, I managed to free myself from limiting guilt, learning to flow with life in a new way, making decisions no longer conditioned but more aligned with my being.
Additionally, I worked extensively on my main, highly stressful work situation and the difficulty of accepting a career change. I worked on my fears, the fear of losing myself in a relationship, on my love patterns, and much more. Every time, it was, and is, like rewriting that event, gaining new awareness, giving a new meaning to what I experienced, and understanding what to do or say differently in specific situations compared to the past, in a way that is more functional for me, breaking dysfunctional patterns, and, by the way, releasing a lot of energy.
During and after the TAI process, I experienced a greater amount of energy, already visible and felt immediately after each TAI session, and which, through the harmonization of my system to new awareness and changes, allowed me to channel it into my daily activities, but also into my creativity, which I felt growing more and more. Moreover, it made me very autonomous because, whenever I feel or experience a situation that causes stress and discomfort, I know how to alchemize it through TAI, using both TAI EXTERNAL and INTERNAL techniques, which I particularly love and frequently use on myself and with my clients, to draw on the resources of feminine archetypes and our future self, who has already realized her dreams and desires. This is because, to reach our goals, dreams, and desires, it is important to work at a vibrational level, which is possible with TAI, allowing the present to change on an emotional, mental, physical, and behavioral level.
Furthermore, with TAI, I gained a lot of self-confidence, mainly due to the work on my personal history, where I strive daily to give new meaning to my past, letting go of old patterns and opening up to new resources, talents, and behaviors. After a year of training with TAI, I am very pleased to use this technique on myself and with my clients because it is a quick and powerful method that allows us to rewrite our past, present, and future, giving new meaning to the past, living the present more peacefully, and creating the foundations for a more serene and happy future.
PART 2: PRACTICAL CASE
For the practical case, I will share the experience of using TAI with a 45-year-old woman from Catania, named Anna, who is currently single and wishes to feel ready for a relationship.
I combined the TAI technique with coaching, applying the principles of the feminine and masculine learned from the Piena di Vita breathing practices. With TAI, we worked on the blockage that was preventing her from reaching her goal.
Before starting, I sent her the Love Matrix, a series of tests and a questionnaire to assess her love patterns, which refer to the behaviors she exhibits through the predominant or deficient aspects of femininity in her current life stage.
Before delivering the test and questionnaire results, we had a preliminary TAI session to understand how TAI works and to do a focusing exercise on the three Dantians and self-observation.
HAND POSITIONS ON THE THREE DANTIANS
Before starting with TAI, we learned how to position the hands on the three Dantians.
I showed her how, for the first Dantian, located about four centimeters below the navel, the hands should be crossed with the fingertips pointing down and thumbs at the navel level. It doesn’t matter which hand is on top; what matters is comfort.
For the hands on the second Dantian, at the heart level, they should also be crossed with the fingertips pointing upward and elbows down. We also reviewed the hand position for the third Dantian, between the eyebrows. Although the preferred Drishti position involves focusing the closed eyes toward the center of the eyebrows, if one feels discomfort, it’s possible to focus on a point 20 centimeters out, aligned with the center between the eyebrows. This is especially crucial when performing instant TAI.
FOCUSING EXERCISE FOR THE THREE DANTIANS
After reviewing the hand positions on the three Dantians, we proceeded with a perception and focusing exercise on the three Dantians.
From this point onward, I will use OT for TAI Operator and C for Client.
OT: “I invite you to take a comfortable position. When you’re ready, you can cross your hands one over the other, placing either the right or left hand on top, whichever feels best, at the level of the first Dantian, about three or four fingers below the navel. I invite you to close your eyes and connect with the first Dantian through your breath and focused attention on this area. Observe how you see, feel, or perceive this first Dantian. Whatever you feel or see is fine; the important thing is to connect with each Dantian.”
C: “I see it as a crown with a black balloon inside, adorned with diamonds, and it’s solid. This balloon changes shape and contains sand.”
OT: “Do you feel any specific temperature or a variation in temperature?”
C: “No, the temperature feels the same, normal, neither hot nor cold.”
OT: “Now, I invite you to bring your crossed hands to the second Dantian, at heart level. You can keep your eyes closed, and I invite you to focus your attention and breath on this Dantian. Gradually observe how you see, feel, or perceive this second Dantian.”
C: “I perceive it as warmer; I see it in a ‘V’ shape and feel a breeze sensation in this area.”
OT: “Now, I invite you to place two fingers on the third Dantian, at the point between your eyebrows, or you can adopt the Drishti position, as seen earlier, focusing your gaze on the point between your eyebrows. If you feel discomfort, you can focus on a point 20 cm out, aligned with the center between the eyebrows. I invite you to focus your attention and breath on the third Dantian and observe how you see, feel, or perceive this third Dantian. You can relax your shoulders, neck, and feel comfortable and at ease as you internally observe your third Dantian.”
C: “I see the shape of a compressed golden triangle; it’s still, and inside it is empty.”
PRACTICE OF LISTENING TO CELLULAR MEMORIES IN THE THREE DANTIANS
After this focusing exercise on the three Dantians, we performed a session of listening to the three Dantians, without yet entering the complete TAI process. I will continue using the abbreviations OT for TAI Operator and C for Client.
OT: “I invite you to close your eyes and place your crossed hands on your first Dantian, three or four fingers below the navel. Focus your attention and breath there. There’s nothing you need to do; simply stay attuned to what happens as you focus your attention and breath on this first Dantian. Take the time you need to listen to what you feel, see, or perceive in this first Dantian, and when you’re ready to move on to the second Dantian, just say ‘OK,’ or I will sense changes that signal it’s time to proceed to the next Dantian.”
C: “(After a few minutes) OK.”
OT: “Good. Now, let’s move to the second Dantian. Focus your attention and breath at the heart level, with your hands crossed, eyes closed. Simply stay attuned to what’s happening within you. Take the time you need to listen to what you feel, see, or perceive in this second Dantian, and when you’re ready to move on to the third Dantian, just say ‘OK.’”
C: “(After a few minutes) OK.”
OT: “Now let’s move to the third Dantian. You can place two fingers at the point between your eyebrows or enter the Drishti position, focusing on that point with your eyes closed. Focus your attention and breath on your third Dantian, and just stay attuned to what’s happening inside you. There’s nothing to do—simply listen. When it feels right to move on, just say ‘OK.’”
C: “(After a few minutes) OK.”
OT: “Now, when you’re ready, you can open your eyes, take a deep breath, and if you’d like, share what came up.”
C: “In the first Dantian, I felt fear about not being in the right place at the right time. I experienced a sensation of warmth and an urge to run away, feeling inadequate. In the second Dantian, I felt melancholy, dissatisfaction, and a sense of not having achieved what I wanted. In the third Dantian, I felt similar inadequacy to what I felt in the belly, but here it was a more judgmental and harsher sensation toward myself.”
OT: “Among what emerged from the three Dantians, what did you feel was the most intense?”
C: “In the third Dantian, the feeling of inadequacy, but more as a judgmental sensation.”
OT: “If you’d like, we can work on this next time with TAI, integrating it with what emerges from the tests and what you bring to me. Does that sound okay to you?”
C: “Yes, perfect.”
OT: “You can do this exercise at home every day, listening to the three Dantians with focused attention and breath, spending at least one minute on each Dantian. Afterward, you can write down what emerged. In the next session, you can tell me how it went and what has changed.”
OT: “Now, we are approaching the end of the session, but before we close, I’d like to ask what you’re taking away from today’s session?”
C: “That I can see things in a detached way but still feel them, and then be able to work on them.”
OT: “Excellent.”
SECOND SESSION OUTCOME ANALYSIS
In the second session with the client, we explored the results from the Love Matrix that we reviewed earlier.
The Love Matrix indicated that the predominant aspect is the shadow side of the Feminine of the Heart (Eve, always available and needy)—a femininity that requires strength and structure (masculine energy) in relationships to build a healthy relationship. It struggles to set boundaries, express needs, and is always available to others, often neglecting herself and not allowing herself to receive. Additionally, there is the shadow side of the Feminine of the Head (Lilith, distant amazon) that needs to be integrated, while the Feminine of the Belly should focus on aspects of connection, body recognition, and embracing beauty and sensuality, akin to Aphrodite, the sensual and charismatic feminine. The test reveals that her love trap is the “runner,” avoiding relationships and men, as it triggers the distant amazon Lilith, who fears losing freedom and not being able to do what she desires. Another trap is the “avoider,” dodging conflicts in relationships, consistent with the prevalent feminine aspect of Eve, the always available, while the masculine side is excessive in giving and doing.
Together, we discussed this outcome.
OT: “We’ve seen your love pattern. What do you think?”
C: “Yes, I recognize it. This happens both in relationships and at work. I feel it strongly at work now because I am single, but it cuts across both: always being too available, prioritizing others before myself, not setting boundaries, being afraid to express my strength and needs, and giving and doing a lot.”
OT: “Given your pattern, what would you like to have for yourself?”
C: “My wish is to be ready for a relationship, but I realize I need to overcome things first, like not receiving, not expressing my needs, feeling unattractive and not enough, feeling unworthy, and being afraid of being in a relationship for fear of losing my freedom.”
OT: “When you say you want to be ready for a relationship, what do you mean specifically?”
C: “Being in balance, not running away when I’m with a man, knowing myself, understanding both my shadow and light sides, planning, staying, and doing concrete things, feeling, seeing, with reciprocity.”
OT: “What would change in your life if you were ready for a relationship?”
C: “I wouldn’t just live in the idea of a relationship, but in the real thing.”
OT: “How would being ready make you feel?”
C: “Good, I’d feel good. I’d accept that the other person has their own pace, and I have mine, and that in a relationship, we need to consider that there’s another person besides ourselves.”
OT: “We’ve seen that to feel ready for a relationship, there are several aspects you need to work on first. What would you like to focus on in this session?”
C: “On staying in my feminine energy, on deserving and on receiving.”
OT: “Which of these three aspects is the most important for you right now, the one you want to work on?”
C: “Staying in my feminine energy to feel ready for a relationship.”
OT: “What does feminine energy mean to you?”
C: “Being gentle, yielding, soft, welcoming, staying in beauty, falling in love, listening, being in harmony, being empathetic, loving, and fun. The problem is that I feel judged by others when I’m soft. I like being this way, but others judge me as too soft, and I don’t want to change. But when they judge me, I shut down, I become rigid, I go silent, I stop listening to anyone, even myself, and I don’t listen to my emotions or others’. I don’t want to share, and I start doing a lot, but then I feel bad in my body, and I go back to being soft, and people judge me again. I oscillate between feminine and masculine.”
OT: “When you say you want to be ready for a relationship, how can the feminine help you?”
C: “The feminine is actually ready, but it’s put aside. I don’t feel secure, I’m afraid to show it, to say ‘this is who I am.’ And because of this fear of showing my feminine, others get the wrong idea about me.”
OT: “What idea do they get?”
C: “That I’m insecure, needy, not authentic, not clear, and there’s an insecurity about showing myself because of my weight, so I tend to hide. That’s when I go into the masculine and start doing a lot, but this makes me feel bad.”
OT: “When we talk about masculine, what do you mean?”
C: “Strength, support, action, but not excessively, determination.”
OT: “When you become rigid, stop listening, go silent, and start doing a lot, what kind of masculine energy is that, in your opinion?”
C: “It’s an unhealthy masculine that makes me feel bad.”
OT: “If the masculine energy you’re describing—strength, support, determination, and balanced action—were to be activated, how would things change?”
C: “If the feminine is struggling, the masculine would offer strength and support, and it could also listen to others, creating unity, and we’d do it together, feminine and masculine. I’m realizing now that I don’t feel this union between feminine and masculine within myself, and that’s why I don’t feel ready for a relationship.”
OT: “So if I understand correctly, there’s a feminine side that is ready for a relationship but hides, appears needy and insecure, and tends to retreat. When you are judged in relationships and at work, a more rigid masculine energy is triggered that doesn’t listen, withdraws, and becomes silent, but this makes you feel bad. Is that right?”
C: “Yes, exactly.”
OT: “When you are judged, what do they say?”
C: “That I don’t enforce my own space, that others can say whatever they want because my kindness is mistaken for weakness.”
OT: “In which context or specific situations does this happen?”
C: “At work with my superiors, and with my ex when I was in a relationship. They attack me when I’m too soft.”
OT: “What do they want from you?”
C: “I don’t know; I think they want me to be stronger, to be able to say no, to express my needs.”
OT: “How do you see these characteristics, as feminine or masculine?”
C: “Masculine.”
OT: “If you activated these masculine characteristics that they are asking of you, how would things change?”
C: “I want to do it, but in my own way, not theirs. However, I need to be united within myself.”
OT: “If you could safely show this feminine side of yourself, without hiding it, while also expressing strength, assertiveness, and clear boundaries as they ask, how would your readiness for a relationship change?”
C: “Receiving would activate; it would be a bodily sensation with both the feminine and masculine parts united. My posture, the way I speak, would change, and in a relationship, there would no longer be a sense of expectation. There would be more harmony and continuity, and I would feel more ready.”
OT: “So, returning to your goal: feeling ready for a relationship, would you like to activate a harmonious masculine that knows how to be strong, express its needs, and say no, doing it your way and not how others want, while uniting it with the soft and gentle feminine that you enjoy showing? This would create an internal couple within you and make you feel more prepared for a relationship. Is that right?”
C: “Exactly.”
OT: “What’s stopping you from doing this and feeling ready?”
C: “Not allowing myself to receive, whether at work or in a relationship. I am always available for others, even with my ex-boyfriend. After a week of silence, he would come back, and I would still be available. This happens at work now, but it affects my love life too. I see it more clearly at work because I’m not currently in a relationship. So it activates at work, but then I wonder, if I meet a man, will it be the same? I find myself excluding myself and not letting others give to me, thinking I don’t need it and I can manage on my own.”
OT: “Is there a specific situation where you always make yourself available and don’t allow yourself to receive?”
C: “As I said before, with my ex, but also at work.”
OT: “Which situation do you want to work on?”
C: “Work is more urgent now because it then spills over into love.”
OT: “Can you describe the situation at work where you are always available and don’t allow yourself to receive?”
C: “I’m on a break, the phone rings, and I answer. I eat poorly and don’t allow myself to enjoy a calm lunch with others.”
OT: “Are you required to answer by contract, or is it your choice to pick up the phone?”
C: “I choose to answer, but I could tell my boss how to handle it. It’s my own availability that I give unconditionally, but I need my break.”
OT: “Can you describe the scene during your break when the phone rings? Who are you with? Where are you?”
C: “I finish my shift and go on break with my colleagues. I bring food from home, heat it up, set the table, take our seats, and then the phone rings, and I go to answer.”
OT: “What strikes you most about this scene? Is it what you see, like an image, or what you hear, like a sound or voice, or what you perceive, like a tactile sensation, smell, taste, or movement? Or is it what you think, believe, or imagine?”
C: “What strikes me is what I see, that I move away and exclude myself because, by doing so, I feel good.”
OT: “Is this image close or far? Black and white or color? Blurry or clear?”
C: “The image is close, brightly colored, and clear.”
OT: “When you connect with this image, what do you feel inside?”
C: “I feel anger because I’m splitting myself in two and not listening to my body that wanted to sit and eat peacefully.”
OT: “What sensations do you feel in your body today, when you are in touch with this image?”
C: “I feel a weight in my stomach and heart and a tightness in my head.”
OT: “And what thoughts do you have when you connect with this image?”
C: “Resignation and the thought that I always have to be the one to do it. I judge myself, telling myself that I’m incapable.”
OT: “When you connect with this image, what is its impact on your life today, on a scale from zero to ten, where zero is no impact and ten is the maximum impact?”
C: “Eight.”
OT: “Okay, now I invite you to place your hands on your first Dantian, at the level of your lower abdomen, with your hands crossed. Focus your attention and breath on your first Dantian and repeat mentally: ‘I am origin.’”
OT: “Now, while still focusing on your first Dantian, breathe consciously into this Dantian, recall the image you saw earlier, and repeat out loud: ‘I reclaim my power and release the energy trapped in this image and everything it represents for me.’ Let it take effect and listen to what happens within you.”
OT: “(When I sense a change, or the client says ‘OK,’ I proceed to the second Dantian.) Now you can move your hands to your second Dantian, at heart level, with your hands crossed. Focus your attention and breath on your second Dantian. Recall the troubling image and repeat out loud: ‘I release all identification and attachment to this image and everything it represents for me.’ Let it take effect and observe what happens.”
OT: “(When I sense a change or the client says ‘OK,’ I proceed to the third Dantian.) Now, in the Drishti position, looking with your eyes closed at the third eye point between your eyebrows—or if this is difficult, shift your focus to 20 cm out, still aligned with the third eye point—bring your attention and breath to the third Dantian. Recall the image and say out loud: ‘I generate order and coherence within myself regarding this image and everything it represents for me.’ Let it take effect and observe what happens.”
OT: “(When I sense a change, or the client says ‘OK,’ I ask what has changed.) Now I invite you to bring your hands back to your first Dantian and tell me: what has changed?”
C: “Now the phone seems to be moved by an energy that I don’t have power over; it’s not my problem.”
OT: “What has changed in your emotions, sensations, and thoughts?”
C: “My head feels lighter than before. I realize there’s no need to answer. I feel more relaxed. The image is blurrier, and there’s no longer any anger. The thought I had before isn’t there anymore; there’s a new thought: ‘And now, what do I do?’ And I feel melancholy, as if I need to answer. If that’s no longer there, I feel melancholic and wonder what to do now. Where do I put this energy and these extra hours?”
OT: “The impact level was eight before. What is it now?”
C: “Three or four.”
OT: “Let’s work on this thought: ‘And now, what do I do?’ How do you see this thought: as text, an image, a voice, in the first or second person, or as something occupying a space inside or outside of you?”
C: “I see it as a black cloud on the left side, near my neck, about the size of a soccer ball, resembling the outline of a judgmental man.”
OT: “What emotions, thoughts, and sensations do you feel when in contact with this thought, represented by this cloud/outline?”
C: “I feel irritated, and I think there must always be someone or something stressing me out, and I feel discomfort in my stomach and ears.”
OT: “When you are in contact with this thought: ‘And now, what do I do?’ what is your level of stress, from zero to ten?”
C: “Seven.”
OT: “Now, I invite you to focus on your first Dantian, breathe consciously into this Dantian, and recall the thought: ‘And now, what do I do?’ represented by the image of a black cloud near your neck that looks like a judgmental outline. Say out loud: ‘I reclaim my power and release the energy trapped in this thought: ‘And now, what do I do?” Let it take effect and listen to what happens.”
OT: “(When I sense a change, or the client says ‘OK,’ I proceed to the second Dantian.) Now you can move your hands to your second Dantian, at heart level, with your hands crossed. Focus your attention and breath on your second Dantian. Recall the thought, ‘And now, what do I do?’ and the image you saw representing that thought. Say out loud: ‘I release all identification and attachment to this thought: ‘And now, what do I do?’ Let it take effect and observe what happens.”
OT: “(When I sense a change or the client says ‘OK,’ I proceed to the third Dantian.) Now, in the Drishti position, looking with your eyes closed at the third eye point—or, if it’s difficult, shift to a point 20 cm out, still aligned with the third eye point—bring your attention and breath to the third Dantian. Recall the thought, ‘And now, what do I do?’ and the image of that thought, and say out loud: ‘I generate order and coherence within myself regarding this thought: ‘And now, what do I do?” Let it take effect and observe what happens.”
OT: “(When I sense a change, I invite the client to bring their hands back to the first Dantian and ask: what has changed from before?)”
C: “Now, that black cloud/man outline is just a shape, and it’s far away, but it could still attack.”
OT: “Let’s work on this shape that could attack, even though it’s far away.”
OT: “Now, I invite you to focus on your first Dantian, breathe consciously into this Dantian, and recall the image of the distant shape that could attack. Say out loud: ‘I reclaim my power and release the energy trapped in this image and everything it represents for me.’ Let it take effect and listen to what happens.”
OT: “(When I sense a change or the client says ‘OK,’ I proceed to the second Dantian.) Now you can move your hands to your second Dantian, at heart level, with your hands crossed. Focus your attention and breath on your second Dantian. Recall the image you saw that caused discomfort and say out loud: ‘I release all identification and attachment to this image and everything it represents for me.’ Let it take effect and observe what happens.”
OT: “(When I sense a change or the client says ‘OK,’ I proceed to the third Dantian.) Now, in the Drishti position, looking with your eyes closed at the third eye, bring your attention and breath to the third Dantian. Recall the image and say out loud: ‘I generate order and coherence within myself regarding this image and everything it represents for me.’ Let it take effect and observe what happens.”
OT: “(When I sense a change, I ask again: what has changed from before?)”
C: “The shape is gone; it has disappeared, but now there’s an angry man. I only see his face, with two teeth showing.”
OT: “Okay, let’s do a round of TAI on this image. Now, I invite you to focus on your first Dantian, breathe consciously into this Dantian, and recall the image of the angry man’s face. Say out loud: ‘I reclaim my power and release the energy trapped in this image and everything it represents for me.’ Let it take effect and listen to what happens.”
OT: “(When I sense a change or the client says ‘OK,’ I proceed to the second Dantian.) Now you can move your hands to your second Dantian, at heart level, with your hands crossed. Focus your attention and breath on your second Dantian. Recall the image that caused discomfort and say out loud: ‘I release all identification and attachment to this image and everything it represents for me.’ Let it take effect and observe what happens.”
OT: “(When I sense a change or the client says ‘OK,’ I proceed to the third Dantian.) Now, in the Drishti position, looking with your eyes closed at the third eye, bring your attention and breath to the third Dantian. Recall the image and say out loud: ‘I generate order and coherence within myself regarding this image and everything it represents for me.’ Let it take effect and observe what happens.”
OT: “(When I sense a change, I invite the client to bring their hands back to the first Dantian and ask: what has changed from before?)”
C: “Now I see a calm sea, soothing and cleansing, it’s a beautiful feeling, everything has vanished.”
OT: “Now, going back to your initial image of you having lunch with your colleagues and the phone ringing, what has changed?”
C: “They found a solution, and there’s no longer a need for me; I don’t have to worry.”
OT: “What would happen now if the phone rang?”
C: “I can delegate and stay still.”
OT: “Earlier in the session, you said you answered because that made you feel good. Does that thought still exist?”
C: “No, it doesn’t anymore.”
OT: “Okay, now that we’ve resolved a blockage, let’s work on resources with TAI. Imagine that when the phone rings, you can delegate and stay still. How do you picture this moment?”
C: “The seat is occupied, I’m on my break, I have a straight posture, and I want to eat outside. I go down to eat a salad, and we all go out together, taking a moment to unplug.”
OT: “How do you see yourself in this image?”
C: “I see myself more colorful, lighter, with a straight back.”
OT: “What resources have you activated?”
C: “Expressing my right to be part of the group like everyone else, in equal measure. I feel less responsible and on the same level as everyone, not feeling more or less than others, and this makes me feel light.”
OT: “Now, I invite you to imagine yourself inside that scene. How do you feel?”
C: “I feel good, and I think that things keep moving, with or without me. I feel less burdened and more feminine, with lighter and more playful thoughts.”
OT: “If you could describe, in a phrase, the act of delegating and staying still while on your break, what would you say?”
C: “I am real and human.”
OT: “What color does this image of you being real and human have?”
C: “Red and yellow.”
OT: “Now imagine that this image representing you—delegating and staying still during your break—is in front of you. I invite you to place your hands crossed over your first Dantian, make contact with your attention and breath, and, with your eyes closed, say out loud: ‘I draw on the energy of my future self who has already achieved this goal of being real and human, and I guide it to my center.’ You can imagine a colorful beam flowing from your future self into your abdomen.”
OT: “(When I sense a change, I say:) Now, you can move your hands from the first Dantian to the second Dantian, with your hands crossed, still with your eyes closed. I invite you to focus your attention and breath on this second center, at the heart level, and say out loud: ‘I align this energy with my essence,’ and let it take effect. You may see the color from the first Dantian change in harmony with your essence in the second Dantian.”
OT: “(When I sense a change, I say:) Now, keep one hand on your heart and place two fingers on the third eye point, between your eyebrows. Focus your attention and breath on this third center, and say out loud: ‘I direct this energy to my present self, here and now,’ and imagine this energy flowing throughout your body, accompanying the visualization with your two fingers guiding this energy across your body.”
OT: “How do you feel now?”
C: “More confident in myself.”
OT: “So, you told me that now, if you’re on a break and the phone rings, you can delegate and stay still. How will you actually do this concretely?”
C: “I’ll talk to my boss and express my need for a break and that I need to have my break to eat with others.”
OT: “How would doing this make you feel?”
C: “At peace. It would relieve me of responsibility and frustration and make me feel I’m asserting a right, not just expressing a need.”
OT: “In the previous session, when we listened to the three Dantians, it came up that you didn’t feel good enough, and it felt more like a judgment. You mentioned feeling this judgment at work and also in your relationship with your ex-boyfriend. What has changed?”
C: “It’s gone now, it has disappeared. I don’t feel judged anymore; I feel more present and grounded.”
OT: “How has the feeling of not being good enough changed?”
C: “I feel more real, and I recognize that I have many strengths, and I don’t need to be good at everything or please everyone. I feel more genuine.”
OT: “If you are more real and human, how does that change things if you meet a man?”
C: “There’s no more expectation, and we meet in reality. The cloud of ‘should’ and ‘could’ is gone because I’m real.”
OT: “Would this also make you feel more ready for a relationship?”
C: “Yes, exactly, because I’d be more real.”
OT: “What are you taking away from this session?”
C: “That being present, in the here and now, is important.”
OT: “How has the situation changed?”
C: “Before, there was too much judgment. Now, things are clearer, I no longer see myself in pieces but as a whole.”
OT: “What concrete action can you take to achieve your goal of being real and human, where you can delegate and stay still, feeling your right to take a break, and by allowing yourself to be real and human, also feeling more ready for a relationship?”
C: “Engaging in spontaneous actions that make me feel human.”
OT: “More concretely, what can you start doing today?”
C: “Write every day: ‘I am real and human.’ This grounds me and keeps me present, so I’ll write it every day in different colors.”
OT: “What would change in you by doing this?”
C: “It would bring out my creative side.”
OT: “And how would things change around you by remembering every day that you are real and human?”
C: “People would see me for who I really am, and they could stay.”
OT: “How would that make you feel?”
C: “I wouldn’t be running away anymore, and I could be in my feminine side of warmth and softness. This would make me feel good.”
OT: “Great. Our session is about to end. Let’s do a harmonization. I invite you to place your hands crossed over your heart, close your eyes, and say out loud: ‘I harmonize all my systems with these new insights and the new version of myself.’”
OT: “How do you feel now?”
C: “Good, lighter.”
OT: “Excellent. So, to sum up, we worked on the shadow side of the Feminine of the Heart, identified in the Love Matrix—a needy feminine that is always available and does not set boundaries, hiding its true self. On the other side, there was a lack of a harmonious masculine energy that knows how to set boundaries, assert itself, and say no. When faced with judgment, a non-harmonious masculine energy would emerge, leading to rigidity, withdrawal, and not listening to others. We saw that this prevented you from creating an inner harmonious couple and made you feel not ready for a relationship. By setting boundaries to your availability, you now feel you can better express your creative, feminine, and nurturing side, and that you can also embody a harmonious masculine side, expressing your rights, setting limits, being less available, and thinking more about yourself, feeling real and human. How does that make you feel?”
C: “Good, like I can show my feminine side that I like, without fear of judgment because I can also set limits and say no, both at work and in love.”
OT: “Excellent, our session has concluded.”
PART 3: CONCLUSIONS
During the TAI journey, it was inevitable to draw parallels between TAI and the feminine and masculine dynamics I learned during the Piena di Vita breathing training by Sajeeva Hurtado. This breathing system, created by Sajeeva Hurtado, of which I am a certified instructor across its various methods, originates from Traditional Chinese Medicine, dance, Taoism and Tantra, and Gestalt therapy. The purpose of this breathing system is to ignite the inner fire, which, together with body movement, dissolves the armor in the belly, heart, and physical body in general, allowing us to access deeper parts of ourselves and release cellular memories. Through breathing and movement, these can be transformed, releasing physical, mental, and emotional toxins, and making room for a more authentic, vibrant self.
It’s important to explain what these cellular memories are, which we work with using TAI and Piena di Vita breathing.
Cellular memories are like space-time capsules that, through TAI or breathing exercises, we retrieve, releasing trapped energy, giving new meaning to the past, and changing the present and future. To explain, these space-time capsules, also known as energetic nodes or traces of incoherent energy, are parts of ourselves that got stuck when something was incomprehensible or overwhelming for us, or both. It’s as if time and space froze at that moment. I compare these space-time capsules, our cellular memories, to glass bottles with a scroll inside, containing the essence of a moment lived—what was incomprehensible or overwhelming for us at that time. These bottles also hold the smells, tastes, images, sounds, movements, thoughts, emotions, and sensations of that moment. When something becomes too much for us, it’s as if these bottles were thrown into the sea. Through TAI, focusing on the three Dantians with attention and breath, and with the Piena di Vita breathing exercises, we can retrieve these bottles, bringing cellular memories to the surface. It’s like finding the bottle washed ashore, allowing us to read the scroll inside, giving a new meaning to the experience, integrating it, and letting go of the rest. This also releases a great deal of energy, which is why working with TAI, and the breathing exercises, not only brings a sense of increasing well-being and happiness but also noticeably increases physical, emotional, and mental energy, positively impacting relationships, personal life, intimacy, work, friendships, and much more.
TAI allows us to reclaim our energy and use it in the best possible way for our life.
With TAI, the breathing exercises focus on the three energy centers: the belly, the heart, and the head.
The method originates from Taoism, which dates back 5,000 years, where the three Dantians and the three types of energy associated with these centers are essential. The Piena di Vita breathing system also refers to belly, heart, and head, known respectively as sexuality, love, and consciousness—which I prefer to call strength, softness, and wisdom.Below, I present the parallels between TAI and the feminine and masculine, referring to specific breathing exercises from Sajeeva Hurtado’s Piena di Vita system, along with my reflections on the feminine and masculine energies, derived from observations, studies, and research over the years.
The Three Dantians and Their Energies
At the level of the first Dantian, located three to four fingers below the navel, we find the raw, vital energy of the first Dantian, which is necessary for daily activities. This Dantian is crucial for grounding, and the more we are rooted in this center, the more we can nourish the other two Dantians. The first Dantian is situated in the belly.
Here, we also have our feminine and masculine of the belly. The energy within the belly, held by the first Dantian, is powerful, and with the Piena di Vita breathing practices, we tap into the strength of our inner animal, a primal force and fire that has been increasingly tamed and subdued, which the breathing exercises help awaken. This process activates instinct, strength, courage, grounding, and energetic drive.
This is where our vital force and energy reside. We have a masculine polarity that tends to give and reach outward, and a feminine polarity that tends to receive, embrace, and transform what it receives.
Next, there is Qi energy in the second Dantian, located at heart level, which acts like a furnace, refining the raw energy of the first Dantian and distributing it throughout the meridians. Here we find the feminine and masculine of the heart, with qualities like gentleness, love, compassion, nourishment, tenderness, empathy, and receptivity. Once again, we see a feminine polarity that tends toward giving and external focus, and a masculine polarity that receives and welcomes love.
Finally, we have the third Dantian, located between and behind the central point of the eyebrows, housing Shen energy,a spiritual energy that allows us to experience presence and self-observation.
This corresponds to the feminine and masculine of the head, characterized by intuition, rationality, awareness, centering, clarity, connection with the universe, thought, mind, and strategy.
The third Dantian embodies a feminine polarity, represented by the right hemisphere of the brain, associated with intuition, creativity, imagination, and fantasy, and a masculine polarity, represented by the left hemisphere, related to logic, rational thought, and verbal expression.
TAI reminds us that these three centers—the three Dantians—exist within us and that it is crucial for the feminine and masculine energies present in each of these centers to be balanced, i.e., in the light and not in the shadow. Each Dantian must be connected to the other, as often we experience disconnection, feeling only a part of ourselves (for instance, just the belly) while neglecting the heart and head, or vice versa. TAI encourages us to perceive the unity of these three centers within us, fostering a sense of completeness and integrity.
Therefore, working with the three Dantians through TAI proves to be highly beneficial, not only for the energetic and emotional detox we perform on cellular memories (space-time capsules) but also for enabling us to connect with these three aspects of ourselves—belly, heart, and head—integrating and activating our inner magnet. This alignment allows us to attract, by resonance, a partner who is similarly aligned, with an active and balanced inner magnet, ultimately leading to the creation of a healthy and happy couple.
For all these reasons, TAI has become the primary approach in my coaching programs, as it relies on the three parts—the three “brains” of belly, heart, and head—which are foundational to my work as a Love/Feminine Coach. The method has proven to bring quick and effective results in both my personal life and with my clients.
Gratitude and Acknowledgment
I am deeply grateful to Andrea Fredi for his professionalism, passion, and expertise in teaching this powerful and effective method, TAI. His guidance has been instrumental in helping me understand and integrate this technique into my practice.
Katia Caterino
Love/Feminine Coach
Coach for the Feminine and Relationships
Email: katiacaterinolovecoach@gmail.com
Website: www.katiacaterino.it
Phone: +39 340/9001991
Facebook: Katia Caterino
Instagram: katia.caterino.femininecoach