TAI and the Couple Relationship
Thesis by Anna Persico
Certification as an Advanced TAI Practitioner
Thesis by Anna Persico
Certification as an Advanced TAI Practitioner
1. Introduction
I have been working as a counselor for several years, trained in Carl Rogers’ Person-Centered Approach and Ferruccio Marcoli’s Generative Psychology. The Person-Centered Approach is based on the belief that the person seeking help possesses the skills and motivation necessary to change themselves, while the counselor’s role is essentially to facilitate this change. The individual is thus the best expert on themselves. I have faith in people and strongly believe in personal power, as described by Rogers, which enables each of us to reach our own truth and congruence. In a state of congruence, there is alignment between what we feel and perceive and what we express, allowing us to live relationships with others and ourselves in a functional and satisfying way.
I have been working as a counselor for several years, trained in Carl Rogers’ Person-Centered Approach and Ferruccio Marcoli’s Generative Psychology. The Person-Centered Approach is based on the belief that the person seeking help possesses the skills and motivation necessary to change themselves, while the counselor’s role is essentially to facilitate this change. The individual is thus the best expert on themselves. I have faith in people and strongly believe in personal power, as described by Rogers, which enables each of us to reach our own truth and congruence. In a state of congruence, there is alignment between what we feel and perceive and what we express, allowing us to live relationships with others and ourselves in a functional and satisfying way.
Before discovering Inner Alchemy Techniques (TAI), I practiced EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) on myself for several years. I studied it independently and practiced it with my psychotherapist, always finding it very useful. In 2023, I followed an EFT-i video course by Andrea Fredi, which sparked the idea of becoming a practitioner. When I contacted Andrea to discuss this, he told me about TAI and how immediate and powerful this technique is. After a trial session with him, during which I further released a very painful memory I had been working on for some time, I was convinced and decided to enroll in the training to become a TAI practitioner.
During the training, I used the technique frequently, first on past experiences and then on fantasies, beliefs, and everything that daily life brought up. In sessions with Andrea, I addressed several important themes, particularly a traumatic experience from very early childhood, of which I have no clear memories but a somatic-sensory memory. Although I had worked on it in the past with body psychotherapy and EMDR, I felt there were still unresolved knots to release. With TAI, I was able to focus on a detail I had never considered before and let it go. I experienced a profound inner joy that lasted for days. It was a wonderful surprise that further convinced me of TAI’s power, its ability to illuminate and give due importance to what seemed like a detail, ultimately allowing it to be released.
2. Case Study
Lisa is a 40-year-old woman who approached me to explore some aspects of her relationship with her partner. They have been a couple for 15 years, and he frequently suffers from physical and psychological issues. They are attending couple’s therapy, and Lisa is very self-reflective, recognizing how some of their relational patterns are dysfunctional. In total, we had 4 sessions over 8 weeks. In each session, I worked using non-judgmental active listening, characteristic of counseling, and TAI in moments when significant issues emerged that needed to be highlighted.
Lisa is a 40-year-old woman who approached me to explore some aspects of her relationship with her partner. They have been a couple for 15 years, and he frequently suffers from physical and psychological issues. They are attending couple’s therapy, and Lisa is very self-reflective, recognizing how some of their relational patterns are dysfunctional. In total, we had 4 sessions over 8 weeks. In each session, I worked using non-judgmental active listening, characteristic of counseling, and TAI in moments when significant issues emerged that needed to be highlighted.
Procedure
In the description of the sessions, I summarize the themes addressed and the results achieved, without going into the details of the procedure, which I briefly clarify here.
The work with TAI always begins with the initial phrase “I am the origin” to affirm personal power. Each TAI sequence (or “round”) is preceded by:
In the description of the sessions, I summarize the themes addressed and the results achieved, without going into the details of the procedure, which I briefly clarify here.
The work with TAI always begins with the initial phrase “I am the origin” to affirm personal power. Each TAI sequence (or “round”) is preceded by:
-
An assessment of the impact of the theme on the person using an intensity scale from 0 to 10;
-
Meta-questions necessary to clarify what triggers automatic reactions to this theme and to define the characteristics and intensity of these reactions.
The sequence consists of focusing on the Dantians and consciously formulating the related phrases (which may vary slightly depending on the situation and the person):
-
Placing the hands on the first Dantian, located below the navel, one says, “I reclaim my power and release the energy held in… (theme)”;
-
With the hands on the second Dantian, at the level of the solar plexus, the phrase is, “I let go of all identification and attachment to… (theme)”;
-
Placing two fingers on the third Dantian, located at the third eye, one concludes by saying, “I generate order and coherence in myself regarding… (theme).”
At the end of each sequence, the intensity is reassessed, and what has emerged is explored further. At the end of the session, to conclude the procedure, one focuses on the second Dantian, pronouncing the harmonization phrase: “I harmonize all my systems to this new awareness/to the changes underway.”
Although it is a simple procedure, it is not just about repeating phrases. It is important that the person focuses on the Dantians and pronounces the phrases consciously. The practitioner contributes to TAI’s effectiveness by putting the person at ease, understanding which theme to highlight, and listening carefully to what emerges to go deeper.
Although it is a simple procedure, it is not just about repeating phrases. It is important that the person focuses on the Dantians and pronounces the phrases consciously. The practitioner contributes to TAI’s effectiveness by putting the person at ease, understanding which theme to highlight, and listening carefully to what emerges to go deeper.
Session 1
The main theme of the first session is rigidity: Lisa feels rigid toward herself and her partner. In the relationship, she feels wrong and that she needs to change. She also wants her partner to behave differently and is convinced that he will “improve” in their relationship and change only if she does so first.
After explaining how TAI works, I ask her meta-questions and apply the sequence to rigidity: first on the belief “I should be less rigid” and then on the fantasy “He will change if I change first.” During the sequences, memories emerge, and we talk about her family and how she has always felt rigid and wrong for being so.
At the end of the session, Lisa says she feels calmer and realizes she cannot be solely responsible for the course of their relationship or her partner’s willingness to change.
The main theme of the first session is rigidity: Lisa feels rigid toward herself and her partner. In the relationship, she feels wrong and that she needs to change. She also wants her partner to behave differently and is convinced that he will “improve” in their relationship and change only if she does so first.
After explaining how TAI works, I ask her meta-questions and apply the sequence to rigidity: first on the belief “I should be less rigid” and then on the fantasy “He will change if I change first.” During the sequences, memories emerge, and we talk about her family and how she has always felt rigid and wrong for being so.
At the end of the session, Lisa says she feels calmer and realizes she cannot be solely responsible for the course of their relationship or her partner’s willingness to change.
Session 2
Lisa has practiced TAI at home. Today, she is very sad and angry, convinced that she and her partner are separating, as he has been withdrawn for several days. She feels inadequate when she is with him. I ask her for an image of this sense of inadequacy, and she describes a typical situation at home. We apply TAI to it. After the sequence, Lisa begins to question the belief that he is judging her. The image changes; she no longer sees the situation from the outside but enters the image and sees herself sitting next to him. We do a second round with TAI, and the feeling of being judged weakens. Lisa says she would like to be less rigid and more loving but feels rushed and pressured because while she strives to be so, he is unwell. We do a TAI round on the belief: “I am responsible for my partner’s well-being.”
Lisa feels calmer, and I suggest she continue with TAI at home.
Lisa has practiced TAI at home. Today, she is very sad and angry, convinced that she and her partner are separating, as he has been withdrawn for several days. She feels inadequate when she is with him. I ask her for an image of this sense of inadequacy, and she describes a typical situation at home. We apply TAI to it. After the sequence, Lisa begins to question the belief that he is judging her. The image changes; she no longer sees the situation from the outside but enters the image and sees herself sitting next to him. We do a second round with TAI, and the feeling of being judged weakens. Lisa says she would like to be less rigid and more loving but feels rushed and pressured because while she strives to be so, he is unwell. We do a TAI round on the belief: “I am responsible for my partner’s well-being.”
Lisa feels calmer, and I suggest she continue with TAI at home.
Session 3
Lisa is doing much better; she and her partner have clarified several things and feel more loving toward each other. She says she is ready to continue their relationship and notices she reacts less in situations that used to anger her. However, she also feels skeptical, lacking confidence that the relationship will work because, in the past, improvements were short-lived. She fears that the cycle of improvements and setbacks typical of their relationship will repeat, as it has before, leading to the point of wanting to break up again.
We work with TAI on the fantasy that the cycle will repeat, and at the end of the first round, Lisa feels more freedom and possibilities. She says that even if the cycle repeats, it’s okay, and she doesn’t have to follow it through to the end this time. I suggest a second round on what remains of this fantasy.
At the end, she says that maybe this idea of hers is silly and that things don’t have to go as they always have. She feels more relaxed.
Lisa is doing much better; she and her partner have clarified several things and feel more loving toward each other. She says she is ready to continue their relationship and notices she reacts less in situations that used to anger her. However, she also feels skeptical, lacking confidence that the relationship will work because, in the past, improvements were short-lived. She fears that the cycle of improvements and setbacks typical of their relationship will repeat, as it has before, leading to the point of wanting to break up again.
We work with TAI on the fantasy that the cycle will repeat, and at the end of the first round, Lisa feels more freedom and possibilities. She says that even if the cycle repeats, it’s okay, and she doesn’t have to follow it through to the end this time. I suggest a second round on what remains of this fantasy.
At the end, she says that maybe this idea of hers is silly and that things don’t have to go as they always have. She feels more relaxed.
Session 4
Lisa truly feels that something is changing. She now feels less responsible for her partner’s distress and less involved. Her partner also senses that something is changing. With a smile, Lisa tells me how she wishes he were “more as I want him to be and less as he is.” I ask what bothers her about him: “His excessive sensitivity.” She talks about her family, how she has sometimes felt ashamed of him, and how her parents never appreciated him. With TAI, we work on the fantasy of wanting him to be different. During the sequence, an image emerges that surprises her and makes her laugh. We work with TAI on this image. At the end of the round, Lisa says she feels obliged to immediately find a solution to her partner’s distress. We work with TAI on this belief and conclude the session. Lisa leaves surprised by the image that emerged.
Lisa truly feels that something is changing. She now feels less responsible for her partner’s distress and less involved. Her partner also senses that something is changing. With a smile, Lisa tells me how she wishes he were “more as I want him to be and less as he is.” I ask what bothers her about him: “His excessive sensitivity.” She talks about her family, how she has sometimes felt ashamed of him, and how her parents never appreciated him. With TAI, we work on the fantasy of wanting him to be different. During the sequence, an image emerges that surprises her and makes her laugh. We work with TAI on this image. At the end of the round, Lisa says she feels obliged to immediately find a solution to her partner’s distress. We work with TAI on this belief and conclude the session. Lisa leaves surprised by the image that emerged.
Final Feedback
Three weeks later, I speak with Lisa on the phone to get feedback on the situation. She genuinely feels that her way of experiencing the relationship has changed. She can now see her partner’s perspective and not take everything that happens with him personally. She has stopped feeling inadequate and wrong in the relationship and realizes that many of her partner’s behaviors are due to the physical and psychological distress he is facing.
Thanks to TAI, Lisa has organized her thoughts and feelings and connected more with her body to process information in a new way for her. In particular, she says that the images that emerged with TAI and their processing helped her greatly. Despite the initial skepticism, she finds TAI very useful and would like to continue using the technique.
Three weeks later, I speak with Lisa on the phone to get feedback on the situation. She genuinely feels that her way of experiencing the relationship has changed. She can now see her partner’s perspective and not take everything that happens with him personally. She has stopped feeling inadequate and wrong in the relationship and realizes that many of her partner’s behaviors are due to the physical and psychological distress he is facing.
Thanks to TAI, Lisa has organized her thoughts and feelings and connected more with her body to process information in a new way for her. In particular, she says that the images that emerged with TAI and their processing helped her greatly. Despite the initial skepticism, she finds TAI very useful and would like to continue using the technique.
3. Conclusions
Working with Lisa was very satisfying. Using TAI on the couple relationship and her way of perceiving herself and her partner helped her immensely to rediscover her center and congruence. I am happy to see her calmer, and although the situation remains complex, I am convinced that she now has more resources to approach the relationship in a centered and functional way.
After about 6 months of practicing TAI, I have found a certain ease in integrating this technique with Person-Centered Counseling. Compared to the non-directive nature of my approach, TAI has a directive aspect, meaning that as a practitioner, I give instructions and input and guide the session more actively. Initially, I had to experiment, and finding a balance was not straightforward. It helped me greatly to realize that the phrases in the TAI sequence evoke both personal power, a cornerstone of Person-Centered Counseling, and coherence, a term from physics translatable as order and harmony, which can easily be interpreted as congruence, another pillar of the Person-Centered Approach. Counseling and TAI also share the goal of making people autonomous, enabling them to take care of their psychological well-being without the constant help of a professional.
In conclusion, TAI is proving very useful in my practice in various contexts, particularly in situations where the person is stuck, unable to connect with their feelings and emotions, and struggles to listen to their body’s reactions to various themes. Although it is sometimes met with skepticism, TAI always works, surprising people and, each time, me too!
I thank my friends, family, and clients who, in recent months, have trusted me and tried TAI, allowing me to practice and improve. I also thank Andrea for creating this technique and making it available to everyone with professionalism. I will continue with enthusiasm to contribute to the spread of TAI and the well-being of people.
Working with Lisa was very satisfying. Using TAI on the couple relationship and her way of perceiving herself and her partner helped her immensely to rediscover her center and congruence. I am happy to see her calmer, and although the situation remains complex, I am convinced that she now has more resources to approach the relationship in a centered and functional way.
After about 6 months of practicing TAI, I have found a certain ease in integrating this technique with Person-Centered Counseling. Compared to the non-directive nature of my approach, TAI has a directive aspect, meaning that as a practitioner, I give instructions and input and guide the session more actively. Initially, I had to experiment, and finding a balance was not straightforward. It helped me greatly to realize that the phrases in the TAI sequence evoke both personal power, a cornerstone of Person-Centered Counseling, and coherence, a term from physics translatable as order and harmony, which can easily be interpreted as congruence, another pillar of the Person-Centered Approach. Counseling and TAI also share the goal of making people autonomous, enabling them to take care of their psychological well-being without the constant help of a professional.
In conclusion, TAI is proving very useful in my practice in various contexts, particularly in situations where the person is stuck, unable to connect with their feelings and emotions, and struggles to listen to their body’s reactions to various themes. Although it is sometimes met with skepticism, TAI always works, surprising people and, each time, me too!
I thank my friends, family, and clients who, in recent months, have trusted me and tried TAI, allowing me to practice and improve. I also thank Andrea for creating this technique and making it available to everyone with professionalism. I will continue with enthusiasm to contribute to the spread of TAI and the well-being of people.
Anna Persico
Counselor – Psychosocial Consultant
www.traleonde.ch
Counselor – Psychosocial Consultant
www.traleonde.ch